Dark Lilly's Hunger
©Purely Cynnefull Designs
My friend Lilly saw my picture of Hunger and she asked to use it in her myspace page. I found some flame lettering to write, "The darkest Lilly of them all..." to go with her screen name. She was so excited that she let me write her "about me" section. In case you were wondering what it says but hate dealing with myspace to see it:
It seems that no matter what I have it is always raped from me due to love's dark side: jealousy, envy and trust issues. Since I was abandoned by the ones who said that they cared about me, I have turned my back on them and on the things that I have held dear up until now. My heart has grown dark cold like black ice. My body has turned to steel with layers and layers of armor. My birthright made me a late spring now life has made me into a dark cold winter. Like the vampire I am the walking living dead that isn't welcome in the light of day. I have retreated into the darkness and to the protection that the mother moon gives me. For she is my safety; the only one that truly understands what my heart hides deep within it... The darkness that is within me keeps growing every day. I try not to let it show through but it is seeping through my skin like cancer.I hold my breath waiting for the moment to reveal that which I keep secret. Waiting in the mere hope that The Creator will answer the heartfelt pleas that I have silently kept at bay for all my life. I have no happy thoughts, just fleeting thoughts of things that will never come to be...No happy or ever pleasant things to recall in my time of need...now I am shattered and beyond repair playing dead so that I do not have to live. My whole entire being screams out loud without words for the strength to put me back together again. I've done all that I can to keep all of the rage bottled up but there is no more room left for it to hide. The rage that has been my confidante has finally begun to have its way within me. What was never light has lost its self in the darkest abyss of my psyche where all of my horrors reside... The transformation has already begun. What was the old Lilly is no more; all that remains is the beauty forged out of the night. Blessed by darkness I have become the darkest Lilly of them all...
It seems that no matter what I have it is always raped from me due to love's dark side: jealousy, envy and trust issues. Since I was abandoned by the ones who said that they cared about me, I have turned my back on them and on the things that I have held dear up until now. My heart has grown dark cold like black ice. My body has turned to steel with layers and layers of armor. My birthright made me a late spring now life has made me into a dark cold winter. Like the vampire I am the walking living dead that isn't welcome in the light of day. I have retreated into the darkness and to the protection that the mother moon gives me. For she is my safety; the only one that truly understands what my heart hides deep within it... The darkness that is within me keeps growing every day. I try not to let it show through but it is seeping through my skin like cancer.I hold my breath waiting for the moment to reveal that which I keep secret. Waiting in the mere hope that The Creator will answer the heartfelt pleas that I have silently kept at bay for all my life. I have no happy thoughts, just fleeting thoughts of things that will never come to be...No happy or ever pleasant things to recall in my time of need...now I am shattered and beyond repair playing dead so that I do not have to live. My whole entire being screams out loud without words for the strength to put me back together again. I've done all that I can to keep all of the rage bottled up but there is no more room left for it to hide. The rage that has been my confidante has finally begun to have its way within me. What was never light has lost its self in the darkest abyss of my psyche where all of my horrors reside... The transformation has already begun. What was the old Lilly is no more; all that remains is the beauty forged out of the night. Blessed by darkness I have become the darkest Lilly of them all...
-©Ashlee Elizabeth Lindsay
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